Posted by: Alton Rocker | July 1, 2011

“Connecting” – 4 times a day

There are four crucial times for daily connection in marriage

Visit any dealership and within minutes you’ll be faced with the temptation to run your hand along the body of the brand new sports car parked prominently in the center of the sales floor.  It’s sleek, shiny, and undeniably attractive; but any true auto aficionado will tell you it’s what’s under the hood that matters.  Those fancy foreign models are fun to drive, but they need extra attention; and if the engine isn’t firing on all cylinders, you’ll soon find yourself just spinning your wheels.

A great marriage is far more precious than a sports car; and it shouldn’t be just a fantasy.  Daily maintenance is a necessity.  Let’s look at four points of daily connection that will keep the relationship between you and your spouse running smoothly – and in the same direction!

Connection #1

The first time is before you even get out of bed in the morning.  What does it look like?  It’s before you’re really even out of the sheets.  Perhaps one of you awakens and thinks about the other person, and then says it out loud – “Lord, thank you for my spouse.”

Connection #2

When one or both leave for work in the morning.  A kiss goodbye, a hug, and perhaps a simple prayer that God will give them a glorious day. You’re connecting, building a resiliency that will be needed in times of conflict and difficulty.

Connection #3 

It’s that critical time when we’re coming home from work.  You’ve been in the workplace all day, or accomplishing that impossible list of twelve things, and now you meet for that first time in over eight hours.  Some call it the Valley of the Shadow of Death, somewhere between 4PM and 7PM.  Things can go either way, it’s very touch and go.  We don’t want to take the wrong step here because it can cost the rest of the day, and perhaps tomorrow.  What do you do?  What do you say?

Try this:  “I’m here for you, what can I do to help?”   

The first 60 seconds that a husband and wife connect at the end of the work day is the most significant part of the day and set the pace for the evening.  Shut down the Smartphone, take a deep breath, and focus on each other for a moment.  You’ll never regret it.

Connection #4:

Right before you go to bed at night.  What woman doesn’t want to be kissed before she goes to bed?  Kiss your wife.  Go to bed at the same time.  Pray out loud – and it doesn’t matter who starts the prayer.  Hold hands discover that oneness together…When I think about those four times of connection and add them all up – by the end of the day, you’re growing deeper, more intimate, and more emotionally connected in your marriage.

When you are building that connection within your marriage, do you realize that you are building a resiliency for times of conflict or when marriage is really hard?  And it will be from one time to another, you count on it.   Build up your bank of connections now so that when times are tough you’ll have the credit to stop the foreclosure!

Take a little time to view the clip below as Dr. Gary & Barb Rosberg go into more detail about these four “connections”.


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